How to support someone

We can all recognise when someone is having difficulties coping. Often, small everyday actions can make a big difference. 

Noticing changes

Noticing changes in the behaviour of a family member, friend, neighbour or colleague can be the first step to supporting someone. 

Some of the behaviours or changes that you may notice if someone has poor wellbeing or a mental health illness are listed below. It’s important to remember that someone is unlikely to show all these behaviours and there may be other things that you notice that are new or unusual. If you are concerned or worried about someone, it’s important to talk to them.

  • They may be spending more time alone and not want to go out and do the things they normally enjoy doing.
  • They may be more irritable than normal, with the smallest thing causing them to get annoyed with themself or others around them.
  • They may complain of feeling tired, have disturbed sleep patterns, or be sleeping more than usual.
  • They may be skipping meals or eating more than normal.
  • You may notice that they are misusing alcohol or drugs, or taking days off work, school or college.
  • They may be making arrangements, such as giving away prized possessions (for example, pets or family heirlooms).
  • They may talk about not wanting to be around or that people would be better off without them.

Remember, we are all different and not everyone will display all of these signs.

You can find out more about the signs of specific mental health conditions by visiting the mental health and wellbeing page

Remember, recovery is possible. For some people, this will mean improvement in their symptoms. For others, it will be leading a full life while managing their symptoms. 

How to support someone with mental health problems

When someone you care for or know is struggling with their mental health, your support could be invaluable to helping them on their journey to recovery. 

Some practical ways you can support someone with mental health problems include:

Talk to them

Talking really helps. If you are concerned that someone you know may have low mental wellbeing or mental ill health, it is important to talk to them about your concerns. 

If you know of family, friends, colleagues or neighbours who experience mental ill health, talking to them is also important. Remember connecting with others is beneficial for everyone’s mental wellbeing. 

Find out more about talking to someone about mental health

Offer practical support

When someone is experiencing a period of mental ill health, they may find it hard to keep up with day-to-day tasks. 

Offering practical support may help take some pressure off and allow them time and space to focus on their health and recovery. Always ask and respect someone’s decision on your offer of practical support. 

Practical support could include:

  • doing their shopping;
  • cooking them a meal;
  • helping them with household chores;
  • doing something together, like going for a walk;
  • spending time with them.

It is important to follow through on your commitment to provide practical support to someone with mental ill health. 

Be patient

It might take time for someone's wellbeing or mental health to improve. For some people, following the advice on the mental health and wellbeing pages may improve or help them manage the symptoms they are experiencing. 

For others, they may need professional help from their GP, a support service or mental health services.

It is important that you demonstrate patience and compassion to those experiencing mental health problems. This can support someone on their journey to recovery. 

Remember, it is important to look after yourself when supporting someone else.

Support them to access the right support service

Sometimes, people need some extra support for their mental health and wellbeing. You can use the service directory on the Finding help for someone else page. This allows you to filter and search the services that may best meet the needs of the person you are supporting. 

If someone’s mental health is affecting their daily life, they may benefit from support from a professional. You should encourage them to book an appointment with their GP to discuss how they are feeling and their symptoms. Some GP practices now have mental health practitioners that can also offer professional advice. 

The GP will refer some people to mental health services provided by Health and Social Care Trusts or the community and voluntary sector. You should encourage the person you are supporting to attend any appointments they are offered. 

You may also be interested in

  • Talking to someone about their mental health

    Talking to someone about their mental health can be difficult.  Knowing how to start a conversation about mental health or how to respond if someone tells you they are struggling with their mental health, is an important step in supporting someone.

  • Looking after yourself

    When supporting someone else, it is also important that you look after yourself. Looking after your wellbeing is good for you and the person you care for.

  • Finding help for someone else

    An important step in supporting someone who is struggling with their mental health and wellbeing is to find out what support is available. 

     

  • Supporting children and young people

    There are things everyone can do to support the mental health and wellbeing of children and young people at every age.